A funny thing happens when you are forced to sit and do nothing. While recovering from back surgery, I’m not even allowed to bend over. I have to sit and do nothing.
So I’ve been thinking.
I had a funny conversation with my good friend Jack today. He was laughing at me, telling me about a conversation he had with his wife. His wife’s name is Anne.
Jack and Anne were poking fun of me, joking about the thought of me sitting around, with nothing to do. After all, I’m the guy who rode his skateboard around Florida during the hurricane.
When’s the last time I sat and did nothing, for an entire week?
I don’t even do that during vacation.
I’ve been trying my best to take advantage of this period of self-reflection. I’ve been going deep. Thinking about my life, my purpose, my work, my brand, my future and of course, all the reasons why the Eagles are going to win the SuperBowl this year.
I’ve come up with some interesting ideas. Here goes…
I Have More to Give
There was a point in my life when I was so focused, so determined and so ruthlessly driven that I would run through a wall if it meant getting to where I needed to go.
I’m in a much different position in my life now. Back then, I was eating ramen and peanut butter and jelly every day, I had no health insurance, I had no money, I had nothing.
These days, I have a team and I have resources and I have a much better understanding of what it takes to be successful.
But that doesn’t mean I am giving it my all. I’m not.
I have much more to give.
I need to be writing more. I need to be selling more. I need to be doing more service because service is the currency of the Gods.
I need to be helping more people and being more liberal with my time. I need to reading more and learning more and participating more in life.
I’m doing just fine. But for me, “just fine” isn’t what is going to get me the satisfaction I’m looking for. I want to live to the fullest. I want to die with nothing left in me. I want burns and scars and smile lines and cuts on my knees and elbows.
I have an opportunity that few people in the history of the world have had. I have my health, I have my sobriety, I have people that love me. I have everything.
Why not give it all I’ve got? That way, at least I know I’m not dying with any “what ifs.”
It’s Okay to Not Have It All Figured Out
I love online business.
I love it. Building online businesses is the coolest thing in the world. With the internet, we all have the capacity to earn an income around a subject matter that we love while providing value to other people.
It’s the best situation ever. I get paid to do what I love to do and make things that other people enjoy. How could there be a better scenario?
As a seasoned entrepreneur, there are certain habits and ideologies I have that are tough for me to ignore. For instance, I have built my businesses around search engine optimization. In order to construct a website in this “Google friendly” manner, there are certain criteria to abide by.
One of those criteria is to be specific.
Google doesn’t like websites that talk about everything. Google likes websites that talk about one thing. To build an online brand that truly performs well in search, you want to speak to a specific set of people. You want to be an expert on something.
Last week I wrote about seeing an Eastern Blue Bird with my dad and my sister, the month before that I wrote about my best friend finally landing a backflip on the wakeboard.
There’s no rhyme or reason.
I spend so much time thinking about the future of my brand. What am I trying to do? Who am I trying to serve? How am I going to build a business out of this?
I don’t know. That’s okay.
Not everything in my life needs to have an agenda. Not everything needs to have a motivation or a purpose.
It’s okay for me to write, simply because I like the act of writing.
Ultimately, the writing itself is its own reward.
I’m winging it. I have no plan. I have no clue what I’m doing. I’m okay with that.
I Need to be More Patient
If only things would happen in the manner I wish they would.
If it were up to me, JourneyPure would be a nationally recognized treatment brand and in-network treatment would be the national model.
YourBoulder would already be a huge success. I would have an esports newsletter and I would be back to intense garage workouts tomorrow.
I would have been to all the countries I want to visit and I would have written a book. Actually, I would have written 10.
Juliana and I would have a beautiful family and we would have more time to visit Philly and Scotland and Boston to see our parents and siblings. I would have a teleport machine to save on travel time.
It’s good to remind myself how boring that would be. Half the fun of getting somewhere is the adventure of going. The point of hiking up mountains isn’t to get to the top, it’s to enjoy the journey of getting there.
I’m not going to heal up overnight and I’m not going to achieve all my goals overnight either.
There’s beauty in the struggle, and I am better off enjoying the journey rather than wishing for it to pass me by.
Time to Level Up
Seriously, it’s time. I know that this isn’t the best version of myself. I know I can do more, I can be better and I can live more fully.
I feel in my heart that I will regret it if I hold back. I know if I succumb to fear and doubt and worry and laziness, then I will have to live with the pain of not knowing what could have been.
This back surgery has given me a new outlook on life. I am so grateful I am not in debilitating pain anymore. I can’t express how good I feel about that.
This is my chance to level up. I’m going to do that.