What I will miss about Nashville
We spent all day packing yesterday. My home is empty and in shambles. It’s the first time I’ve felt emotional about the move.
When we moved here, I expected Nashville to be a grand adventure. But Nashville never quite lived up to the hype.
Let’s see.
My first year and a half was fully dedicated to JourneyPure.
As much as I value that experience, I didn’t enjoy it at all. I am not a company man and as I look back at that time, I often cringe at it. I am very proud of the work that we did. In fact, it is some of the best work I’ve done in my life. However, I still look back at it and consider it a failure. I had never worked in a corporate team like that before, and there are many moments I wish I could do over.
The reporting, the meetings, the paperwork, the emails, the corporate leadership and the gossip. Ew. It makes me feel icky and I wish I acted more appropriately and was more of a team player. The problem is, that environment is not conducive to me as a person.
By the end of my time at JourneyPure, I had lost my $100,000 investment and I was right back where I started. I’ll never do that again.
Then, Covid happened.
In many ways, I feel grateful for Covid. It’s not at all to ignore the suffering that it caused, that part was terrible. However, I remember during the beginning of Covid a friend said to me,
“when will you ever get a chance to completely ignore the world for a while and work on your projects?”
I took it seriously and I made the deliberate decision to buckle down and outwork everyone during Covid. It’s the only time in my life where I burned out. There aren’t many people who could have kept up with my pace and intensity during that time.
Not to mention, Jules was pregnant.
Juliana’s pregnancy was terrible. She was throwing up every day. We were trapped inside the house. I was working at minimum 12 hours a day and she was throwing up at least 10 times a day.
When I explain it to people, I never feel like I can quite articulate how terrible it was. 9 straight months of terrible sickness. Women are tough man. They are.
We got through it, like we always do.
Then, we got pregnant with Willow.
Willow’s pregnancy was much easier, and truth be told, the last year and a half of Nashville has been the best. We’ve spent lots of time with our neighbors, who we love. We have a family, which is tremendous. We’ve done our best to find ways to make the most of our time here, and there were even moments when we opened ourselves up and said “maybe we need to give Nashville a more of a change.”
But that feeling of comfort never found us. We were always feeling like there was someplace else we would rather be.
Now, the house is empty.
Naturally, I’m being nostalgic and reflecting on the last few years. No matter what, I will always be grateful for this place.
Nashville is where I became a father. Nashville is where I got married. Nashville is where I found Muay Thai and Nashville is where I finally settled in to being the person I always wanted to be.
What I will miss about Nashville.
I will miss our home dearly. This house is perfect. I love our house. I love our gym in the garage. I love going for walks around the neighborhood. It makes me sad that I will never feel the comfort of our home again, but that’s part of life.
I will miss our neighbors the most. Matt and Sarah are amazing. I wish we could convince them to come to Denver with us. I care for them deeply. I hope we stay friends for the rest of our lives. I hope they visit us in Denver and I hope they invite us back to Nashville. When I think of saying goodbye to them is when I feel the most sad.
I will miss Sarah and Tyler at Muay Thai class. I’ve never invited them over for dinner or even hung out with them outside of the gym, but those two really helped me find a passion for Muay Thai. They’ve both inspired me without knowing it, and they both gave me that silent encouragement to keep showing up every week.
I don’t think I will see them again, but I will definitely keep in touch with them on social media and I hope they live beautiful lives together.
I will miss waking up early and sitting at this counter top writing my morning blog.
I will miss Sunday rowing sessions with the garage door open. There is something about our gym that always helped me get my head right.
I will miss looking at the birds in the backyard. I will miss the Mountain Blue Birds the most.
I will miss the people who I’ve come to love. The hardest part is saying goodbye to them.
So thanks Nashville. This is where I became a husband and a father. No matter what, I will always be grateful to you for that.
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